December 31st, 2011
Dear Depression,
I know we’ve been spending a lot of time together over the past month, but with the New Year upon us and all, I’ve decided we should go our separate ways.
It’s natural to have a low following a big high, but this time, instead of just flirting with you, I let you stay the night. And then another. And then a month. I never should have done that, and I apologize for misleading you. This simply can’t be a long term relationship. I’m a one man kind of girl.
Look…it’s not you, it’s me. Don’t worry, you will find someone else. You have incredible strength of character. You are nothing if not consistent and nobody darkens up a room like you do. I never slept so well in my life before you. When we were together, I could wear you like a big warm jacket, put the hood over my head, and simply exist.
Well now that I think about it, maybe it is you a little bit. You never shower or shave and you wear your sweats all the time. Frankly, I like to feel sexy and awesome now and then and it’s impossible to do that when you are around. I need to start putting myself out there so I can reach my potential, and that kind of thing just isn’t your style. We simply want different things out of life.
I know a break up letter is kind of juvenile, but I’m not really interested in your opinion on the matter. Your departure is non-negotiable. I’m kicking you out. Git. Pack it up. Scat. Move out.
Peace,
Lauren
P.S. If I see you spending too much time with any of my friends or loved ones, I’m going to tell them you are bad news.
P.P.S. Happy New Year to all my readers. May we all choose joy in 2012, even when it’s hard work. 🙂
Happy New Year to you, Lauren, and best wishes for a fabulously successful year in 2012!
2012 is your year. Calling it now.
Sounds similar to a letter I gave myself this week! Happy New Year to you Lauren and all the best for an awesome year of training and racing. Can’t wait to cheer you on!
This is so well written – we’ve all been there – that darn Depression is a bit of a tramp and gets around… Keep running and keep blogging – you are an inspiration!
Right on. Here’s to a healthy, happy New Year, Lauren! With lots and lots of running, obviously.
Lauren – I’m glad that you’re through it. The winter always sucks, anyway. Maybe the down-period for your psyche will serve as an extra motivation to rebound in an even more brilliant fashion for 2012! Hope the ITB issues dissolve in a puff of smoke, as well. Cheers.
Depression? Sounds vaguely familiar. Let me lie in bed some more and eat crap and get back to you on that one…
I think you’ll rock ’em sock ’em in 2012 – London is calling! Kate Middleton and Prince William want to cheer you on.
Awesome! We can choose what we put our minds through, but it can be effin’ hard work! Cheers to a 2012 filled with JOY that we choose in our minds! 🙂
Great perspective and very creatively written. As you know, one fleet foot in front of the other, pluck the positive out of every day!
Stay the course,
Adrienne L.
p.s. I’ve loving the Believe I Am Training log so far:)
That was thoughtful to write a letter. Breaking up via text message is de rigueur these days.
Have a great 2012 Lauren. Want to see you in London. #makeitcount!
Hi Lauren,
One word: Lightbox. Well, in your case, two: Lightbox, Olympics.
I’m typically miserable and want to do little but hibernate from late October until the winter solstice. This time I kept my workout routine going so I thought I was fine. Then a friend said, You NEED to use your lightbox. That’s when I realized I had been eating everything in sight. (No, it was not a pretty sight.)
Now I’m back on track, the days are getting–slowly–lighter, and I’m plugging in my lightbox every now and then. And getting my long runs in.
Happy New Year. Fresh start and looking forward to watching you in London.
Too funny! Great post and great way to get off on the right (or left) foot for 2012. Rewarding times (both on the clock and in life) and plenty of training successes are sure to come your way in the next 12 months.
Wow, them’s fighting words. Love your writing and attitude. That Depression guy is going to be cowering and turning tail.
Me and this article, sitting in a tree, L-RAE—N-I-N-G!
No more two-timing my son!!!! Can’t wait to see your cheerful face in Bend. Love you sweetie!
Lauren,
I sent this to a friend who did Ironman Canada, her first Ironman, in August, qualified for the Worlds in Kona and did that a month later. So, coming down from a year of preparation and racing. Funny, she now has a marathon planned in May, I will have her read up on your experience. Thanks for great writing as usual.
Thanks for expressing your thoughts and feelings so eloquently, Lauren, and big “ups” for 2012!
That. Was. Awesome!
Hey Lauren,
It’s honestly great to hear that someone as superhuman as yourself has their human moments. But as always I’m glad to hear your upbeat attitude and clever way of bidding depression farewell.
Happy new year!
Sara
Holy crap I hope you feel happier soon, you’re my goddamn hero.
good seeing J.Cole on there! dude is a beast with it! His dead presidents freestyle on the Warm UP = Ricusuloid! Semtex you need 2 get dude on your show 4 real
Sounds familiar. Love you Lauren! Your strength will overcome.
Thanks for sharing your peculiar, “strength, and hope”. You have never been “negative”
and when you do sound a minor note, it usually ends up being a harmonious one. I especially appreciate your approach to a scary topic. It is enlightening, as usual…reminding me that running need not be feared as a killer of brain cells.
Knees, ??? That’s different…
Well howdy, girl! Good ta have ya back. Was getting worried there… Kick the bum out! Eight months to immortality starting now. You’re healthy, right? Right?
This is one of your all-time bests, Lauren! Shoo-fly, shoo, go away the blues!!
Glad to hear you’re leaving depression’s ass behind. Way to go!
Good work. He needed the boot anyway.
Very well-written….like a true CHAMPION!
Happy new year Lauren! Way to tell that depression off. I was going to say “at least you didn’t send a text” but Ewen beat me to it 😉
London 2012!
Guess what?… 2012 is all YOU!
Great post! 🙂
AMEN! This was just what I needed to read! Yesterday I decided that it was my CHOICE to be happy, and that even if I’m injured, and even if it’s super cold and gloomy outside, I’m going to CHOOSE to be happy! There is SO much we have to be grateful for, and joyful about! It’s been going pretty well so far. I’m just focusing on the little things that I really am happy for and it has put me in a much more enjoyable mood.
Hi Lauren,
You know what’s even better than go out, run & make your dreams come true?
Doing exactly this… when no one expected it.
Keep up the good work.
I think that you’ll appreciate this:
http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/
Best of luck this year!
And this is why you’re my hero. I love this post and I know you’ll kick depression’s butt to the corner. This is absolutely your year to shine. Last year (though still totally awesome) was only a warmup for what’s ahead! 🙂
Happy 2012 Lauren- heal up quick! Wishing you a joyful year full of dreams coming true.
Lauren, as stubborn as the Depression gets…hanging around and trying to creep in after it’s been kicked out…keep telling it to “move on”…and keep building up strength by spending time with friends, taking care of YOU, and before you know it, the depression will “get it” and weaken. Fo every point of Your Self care, depression loses it’s strength.
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